Download the show here sucka:

Building an infrastructure for cooling Antarctica. We have the technology! There are ice cubes in my freezer right now! Some freestyle action. UK Johnny and Matty Briton. Ryan’s got some friends and they’ve got a “J” of Jack Herer. It’s a strain. You can read my thoughts. I’m thinking of your socks. And some big old rocks. And those sick hightops. A helluva fish, farting around in the lach. Mister Spock and his spocky jock. You can hear my thoughts. I’m thinking of pol pot. And how the chemical rot is all the chemical’s got. A picky panda stated he considers me hot. Mister Spock and his spocky jock.

Building an infrastructure for cooling Antarctica. We have the technology! There are ice cubes in my freezer right now! Some freestyle action. UK Johnny and Matty Briton. Ryan’s got some friends and they’ve got a “J” of Jack Herer. It’s a strain. You can read my thoughts. I’m thinking of your socks. And some big old rocks. And those sick hightops. A helluva fish, farting around in the lach. Mister spock and his spocky jock. You can hear my thoughts. I’m thinking of pol pot. And how the chemical rot is all the chemical’s got. A picky panda stated he considers me hot. Mister spock and his spocky jock.

Are you a true believer?

Shout outs, show notes, ephemera:

– Nominate Soccergirl, Incorporated a People’s Choice Podcast Award today!!

– Ryan’s list pf places he’s visiting in China is still coming soon!

– Vote at Podcastalley guys! Remember about how I’ll show you mine!

Download the show here sucka:

I was making making making and I wasn’t giving myself time to refill, to fuel up, to refill with fuel, to refuel by filling. And now, I’m a megaton pony and I’m ready to fight. I’m a gamma ray baby, just about to alight. I’m a krypton bomb with active radio waves. I’m a neutron phaser, you’re about to be phased. An anatomical laser, lase lase. I’m a mechanical weapon, you can’t even see. I’m a tyrannical captain, ruling over the sea. I’m a beneficent victim of the USA. I’m a benevolent teacher of the sexy ways. Rediscovered, unearthed, reimagined, rebirthed… it’s Theoretically Possible Bob! Matty B. with The Hitchhikers Guide to Soccergirl. Many people wrote emails about what I had to say about God. I believe in walking, talking humans made entirely of poop. I believe bologna sandwiches are excellent at Mah Jong. And since believing in something makes it real, we better get the poop people some rights and I’m getting myself a bologna sandwich in order to better understand Amy Tan novels. Ryan hears a sprinkle tinkle, like from nature. I am more than the sum of my electromolecular outputs.

Are you a true believer?

Shout outs, show notes, ephemera:

– Ryan’s list pf places he’s visiting in China is still coming soon!

– Vote at Podcastalley guys! Remember about how I’ll show you mine!

Download the show here sucka:

Adam Curry, the infamous Podfather himself, has a very serious case of Soccergirl fever! Fuck Lonelygirl right in the butt. I’m Soccergirl! Ryan’s going to China (see below for specifics). If you are in China and you want to get in touch with Ryan (and somehow my show isn’t blocked by your oppressive government) email me at soccergirlincorporated@gmail.com. We introduce a new segment called: “Learn how fucking hard it is to learn Chinese in 30 days.” Ryan is learning lots of new facts, like how in the pIlgrim guidebooks for auspicious places they specify where you can urinate of fart without offending local spirits (good to know). Turns out there are many ways in which the Dalai Lama is not a nice man. Some intimate information about the ways in which I suck dick. A message from God.

Are you a true believer?

Shout outs, show notes, ephemera:

– Ryan’s list pf places he’s visiting in China coming soon!

– Vote at Podcastalley guys! Remember about how I’ll show you mine!

Download the show here sucka:

So let’s say I’m going to believe in God. Which religion does he endorse? How do I choose? Jews, Christians, Muslims out there, tell me please, what makes your book THE book? If you really want a god to worship, you should meet my friend Stanley. UK Johnny and Matty Briton report on the first ever international tickle chicken competition! (featuring me and Ryan P.) I have a mutant leg hair, the result of thousands of sub-par follicles joining as one. A tower to the stars. I want to make my own 8-track 2XL tapes so bad. A fucked up Supreme Court decision looks like the end of unique circumstances. So I guess that exception to the rule thing only works for mathematics. But if you get hot when people testify, being a judge is probably the line of work for you, not only because people are testifying all day long but also because you get to wear a conveniently concealing robe. But, if you think about it, there really could me masturbators in every profession, including stuntman and acrobat. The way I see it, it really doesn’t make any sense to be a moderate religious person because if you believe a book is God’s word, and everyone who doesn’t is going to hell, you should be at my door saving me right now. There’s no place for picking and choosing what you *think* is true. Based on what!? What you think makes sense? I’m sure God loves that. Ruth Bell Graham wore lipstick because she didn’t think it was a credit to Christ to be drab.

Are you a true believer?

Shout outs, show notes, ephemera:

– If you have any information about mutant leg hairs, please email me at: soccergirlincorporated@gmail.com

– Check out the book The End of Faith by Sam Harris (and his website)

– Vote at Podcastalley guys! Remember about how I’ll show you mine!

Download the show here sucka:

We’re back from Arkansas! Allow me to describe my trip in song. We checked out the Walmart Visitor’s Center in Bentonville and boy was it something. Nancy Pelosi can suck it. Speaking of sucking, some disturbing news has been under discussion on the forums lately, namely that blow jobs can cause cancer! (check out the thread here). This is terrible news, especially for those of us who are “a-DICK-ted” (get it?) This prompts a very serious discussion of a disease that deserves a whole lot more press. It’s name? Why, Cockenpox of course! A newly revised story called “Now Her Legs Are Folded in the Style of Indians” awaits your learned comments. Be part of the Soccergirl, Incorporated book! Write or call today! (soccergirlincorporated@gmail.com or 206-600-4SEX). Thanks for the audio comment gold! Gay clones. Gotta love ‘em! Lastly, some flava which is called “Evidence of Soccergirl” by Kevin Willis.

Are you a true believer?

Shout outs, show notes, ephemera:

– Nancy Pelosi’s dumbass comment as quoted in the New York Times (June 8, 2007): “Science is a gift of God to all of us and science has taken us to a place that is biblical in its power to cure.” ARGH! It’s SCIENCY you dolt! SCIENCY I say!

– Check out our guest hosting job on The Dawn and Drew Show!Vote at Podcastalley guys! Remember about how I’ll show you mine!